41. The Big, The Fat, and The Rich

Looking around at all their faces, I tried to process the crazy idea.

When the Gem awakens to call a Hero, the world is ill prepared...and its fate is placed in the hands of a 17 year old boy, named Wendell. 

Some will say this is nothing but a tale of fiction.
Let them think as they may. 

After all...I can't fix stupid.

Previously: Chuck shares the history of the Demoni Vankil seals and how one was conveniently placed among the little folk. Alhannah breaks the stress in the room by suggesting something truly crazy to solve the issue at hand…

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No, money can’t buy you happiness…but it sure makes a lot of other crap easier to deal with.

I sat upright.

Everyone but Lili was grinning uncomfortably wide.

…at me.

Ever had one of those moments?

People looking at you in a way that you wonder if they’re thrilled…or they’re hungry and want to eat you?

Just me?

Yeah. Creepy.

Looking around at all their faces, I tried to process the crazy idea.

“Trench Wars,” I said.

Alhannah nodded. “Yeah.”

“Me. Fight in Trench Wars.”

Dax nodded. “Yeah.”

“In those robots…”

“S.L.A.G.s,” Alhannah corrected me.

“Sorry, S.L.A.G.s…like the ones you showed me on the,” I scratched my head.

“uPod,” Dax finished.

“YEAH!” squealed Chuck, rattling his staff in the air. “You don’t have to say thank you just yet, son,” he stammered, “‘Hannah here will have to get you a sponsor.”

“Woah, woah, woah. Sponsor? I’m still trying to grasp this idea! Yeah, I want to help, but…I mean, I will help, don’t get me wrong.” The chair suddenly felt uncomfortable to sit in. “How is me, fighting alone in a…S.L.A.G. going to help?”

Alhannah threw her arm over Dax’s shoulder and gave him a side-squeeze. “Actually, I thought it would be even better if all three of us got in the pits.” She nudged the elf. “Do this as a team.”

“Me?” Dax yelped. “SweEET!” He jumped high, flipping backward, and landed on the kitchen table. It creaked under his weight. He started what I think was dancing. “This is…gonna be…so much fun!”

Not wanting to be the party pooper, I forced myself to grin back. They seriously thought this was fun? Strapping yourself into a giant walking can? I tried to imagine the explosions and, if I remember correctly, gunfire. Add to that the screaming fans all around you.

Fans.

Huh.

Then again, I hadn’t truly considered the goal.

They wanted me to become the grand champion.

Of Trench Wars.

Clockworks City #1 Extreme Sport.

Huh.

Then it hit me.